It's been a while

The last time I blogged, it was about autumn. Now, it is spring and as the snowdrops are fading away, the crocuses and daffodils have taken over. Christmas has been and gone; already a hazy memory and, as the days start to get ever longer, the birds are beginning to build their nests and the promise of new life beckons.

We have had snow here, like many places this winter but, apart from that, winter has been a long one for me. Scleroderma has chosen not to be kind to me lately and I have suffered from digital ulcers like never before. My only pain relief has been morphine and I have been numbed down and out of it for a few months now. I don’t think I suffer from depression, but I have been down with zero energy and vast amounts of lethargy. When this happens, all I want to do is sleep or gaze out of the window at the trees.

Ever since I can remember, I have had a fascination of trees. I marvel at their ability to live so long, when we are here for just a fraction of time in comparison. I love the different varieties; their colours, sizes, blossoms, fruits and texture of bark. We are fortunate here that from every single window of our cottage, we can see trees: trees of all descriptions – oak, perry pear, hazel, silver birch, elder, ash, copper beech, apple and plum trees, plus a huge eucalyptus tree right at the bottom of the garden, with its amazing peeling bark. When my nephew and niece come to stay, we write secret messages on the bark and lay a treasure trail around the garden. We have had magical moments doing this, but they grow all too quickly and will soon rather sunbathe, listening to their IPods instead.

My “therapy” is my tree gazing. I have long since learnt to listen to my body when it is not firing on all cylinders, and so our trees have listened to my misery and pain and ever so gently, kicked me up the bum and nudged me back on course. They have turned a blind eye to my attire (I have been unable to do zips and buttons for over 2 months) as I have slobbed around in pull up trousers and sweatshirts. And now they are teasing me to want to go outside and do some gardening, but it has turned too cold for me again and I have to content myself with making plans and drawing up planting maps for my raised vegetable beds.

At least now I can type again! I am VERY slow and my fingers are clumsy, but I get there in the end. I am healing daily as the spring advances and there is a hint of warmth to the sun (not today, though!). I will never be fully “well” or cured, but I always get my equilibrium back – this winter has been harder to get through but I received good news that my funding has been granted for the drug “Bosentan” last month. I was in hospital having my Iloprost infusion (to try and kick start the healing of my ulcer) when my letter came and that was the icing on the cake. I participated in the drug trial for Bosentan and afterwards was given the drug for a 12 month period, free of charge by the drug company. This was 2 years ago and for the last year without the drug, my ulcers have been very spiteful. Bosentan doesn’t stop the ulcers coming completely, but makes them heal much faster. It is also used by sufferers of pulmonary hypertension but, fortunately, my “type” of Scleroderma means I am less likely to have this. So, enough! I have my little pills once more, my ulcer is shrinking slowly and I am feeling stacks better. Life is pretty darned good and I am back in the frame of mind to realise it.

It is growing dusk now and I am off to put the chickens to bed. Our ex battery hens have settled in wonderfully and are keeping us in more eggs than we can eat. Neighbours and friends are enjoying the eggs too and come to see them grubbing around in the dirt. They are such characters and so friendly – you only have to walk towards their gate and they come running to see what presents they have. Their favourite is mash potato, but they love rice, bread, veg peelings, chips (!), grapes, apples, strawberries and pasta. They love being picked up and stroked and the kids love to go and fetch the eggs when they come to stay. It couldn’t have worked out better – they give us so much amusement and we give them love and a safe environment.

So, until another time (not so long, I hope) – wellies, body warmer and gloves are to be donned before I venture into the cold air to close that pop hole! xx

Autumn reflections

Autumn is my favourite season. Well then, of course, there’s spring too, and summer’s good………. even winter has its blessings. Let’s face it, I love living in this country because we do get to experience ALL of the seasons, although summer can be noticeable by her absence! By the end of each season, I am ready for the next: looking forward to the changes ahead and hauling the next season’s clothes out of storage. This time of year is a triumph of colour, a feast of preserving and storing and that distinctive smell of wood smoke as tiny spirals dance lightly from cottage chimneys. Putting a match to the fire and hearing the crackle and spit; seeing the flare of flame and inhaling the smell of apple wood. Candles glimmer on the mantelpiece and the house smells of apple spice, cinnamon or winter berries. I put hand crocheted “granny” blankets over the backs of all the chairs and the curtains are drawn against the ink black night.






Today was one of those autumnal days of watery sunshine and I went to a local church to clean it for my mum. Mum is the official church cleaner but she is spending the week up in Scotland with my dad and I have volunteered to step in. Bromesberrow church is such a lovely church. It dates back to 1170AD and is full of architectural gems. The drive up to it is a tree-lined avenue and today the sun set the colours off to perfection. Bromesberrow lies in the foothills of the Malverns, where they merge into the Eastnor hills. From the A417, the timber framed spire can be seen jutting out from the trees and standing in relief against the gentle rolling landscape of the hills.




And then, in a spiritual juxtaposition, behind Bromesberrow (or Bromsberrow as it is also called), following the twisting lanes, you come to White Leaved Oak – a tiny settlement nestling at the base of the hills. There are some amazing walks around here, not least a visit to the White Leaved Oak itself. Much folklore and legend has sprung up about this tree, including debates as to whether it is THE original pagan White Leaved Oak. Nonetheless, it is clearly a place of pilgrimage and the tree is adorned with crystals, ribbons, flowers and crafts, especially at Solstice. It is said the tree marks the centre point of laylines which include locations such as Stonehenge and Glastonbury.

Wherever your Spiritual faith lies, on a day like today, you only have to look around you and see the wonders of nature and marvel at her display of vibrant colours, even as she is dying off, ready to be reborn in the Spring. My drive home was spent in quiet contemplation: having been moved by stories from other PurpleCoo members, seeing nature at work, spending time in the serenity of that ancient church and thinking of family and friends. It is these quiet, still moments that bring us closer to who we really are and I felt the stress ebb away.

I drove up the lane, glad of my 4x4 as I plunged through mud and yet more mud. Now I know why I always seem to have a stripe of mud on the inside of my right calf – note to self “wash the door sills!” As I reverse on the drive, J is in the kitchen window and the kettle is gently sending puffs of steam from its spout as it boils on the Rayburn. He knows me so well, this man of mine………….

Hens, carpets and gravel!

Here are our new girls! I’m not a fan of soap operas, but when I was a child, I remember watching Coronation Street with my Nan so, when naming our new additions; it just HAD to be done. Welcome to Ena (Sharples), Betty (don’t know what her surname was), Hilda (Ogden) and Mavis (Riley).







Nearly one week on and they are getting their feathers back. They have learnt to scratch around in the dirt, stretch their wings and even jump up onto the roof of the hen house we borrowed for them. Tonight, we put them into our own hen house with our Buff Orpington girls and, hopefully, by tomorrow they will all be fully integrated.




Oh, and the eggs! We were a bit worried about the quantity we would get, as they are ex-battery hens but, no need! We are getting 3 eggs a day and, yes, they are delicious. Our Buffs lay pale, creamy coloured eggs – these are ever so slightly smaller and brown. We had one egg laid in the transporter box as we brought them to their new home and we gave it to my niece – first egg for a special young lady.

The other exciting thing that has happened is our new stair runner! It was fitted today – our bargain, half price, lovely, scrummy, Roger Oates carpet. (It looks more pink in the photos but it is actually a raspberry colour!) During our alterations, we moved the staircase and, on one of my eBay forages, I found an antique stair rope and carpet clips – so, a stair runner it just had to be. Roger Oates’ studio is in Eastnor, Herefordshire and I have long loved his carpets and visited the studio shop often, as it is just down the road. Our latest visit brought with it the delight in finding a runner that was only ever produced as a sample, and there was enough for our stairs! At half the normal price, it had to be……..





And finally for today, I am off to bed to get an early night in preparation of a gravel delivery which, with mum and dad, I will be spreading over the membrane I have laid in the front garden. Tomorrow night, no doubt, I will have a bad back and blistered hands from raking!

And......... the kitchen.

Our bargain eBay kitchen out of a farmhouse, re-jigged by our carpenter and walls liberally decorated with some of Jimmy's enamel signs found at a car boot sale.








We were VERY naughty and bought a Lec retro fridge (also off the internet!)

Alfie looks very bored by it all now.

Finally - some extension pics!

Some pictures of our new bedroom and ensuite - kitchen, hallway, new stairs and outside to follow!

Getting back on track

Office – paint everything and wax everything else. Hang blind.
Downstairs loo – paint shoe pigeonholes.
Utility room – Wax window and sand/reseal worktop and sink area. Paint inside cupboard doors (yes, I know you can’t see inside but I’ll know they need doing…) Get a blind. Hang it.
Garden – don’t go there!


I’m not going to talk about the extension – the “to-do” list speaks for itself and my life is nearly back to normal. Well, as normal as they usually are in our household.

J finally found the leads for the camera but, in the meantime, we have had nightmare internet problems and India Telecom, sorry, British Telecom, have taken their time in sorting them out. I shan’t embroider on that but I’m sure you know EXACTLY what I mean. Suffice to say, things have been fraught here as J tries to run a business with temperamental internet access for checking orders and emails.

For me, things have also not been so good. My health has been pretty naff (all Scleroderma related) and I’ve been as hacked off, fed up, low, bordering on depressed and as antisocial as anyone can get. There! It just feels good getting out. How anything has got done chez Woozle, (by Woozle, that is) is pretty amazing but I’ve slowly hauled myself from my fog of self pity and, as I have been able to start walking again bit by bit, got back out into my garden and let it weave its magic on me. I’ve averted my eyes from the triffid-like weeds that have leapt up everywhere and systematically tackled my borders; plants have re-emerged from tangles of bind weed, along with my good humour.

A couple of weeks ago, I managed a few days down in Cornwall at my friend’s parents’ who have retired to Delabole. I was so chuffed to be able to go on a cliff top walk, without a stick and even with a spring in my step (when I wasn’t going uphill!). We walked from Daymer Bay round towards Rock, but the rain clouds started to gather on the horizon (again!) so we headed back to the car and ate ice-cream as the rain pelted the roof and the windows steamed up around us. Bliss, actually! The waves rolled in, topped by brilliant white crests of foam and the wind whistled through the car, but we grinned at each other over our cones and laughed at our red tipped noses and cheeks and windswept hair.

The next day we visited a National Trust property – Trerice. I really loved it as it wasn’t too big and you could almost imagine living there (funds permitting). The gardens were gorgeous – not too formal and the orchard was a delight to walk through. Round by the vegetable area and greenhouses there was a scything demonstration and the young girl made it look so easy as she used tiny movements, back and forth, to clear around the bases of trees. We ate cake and drank tea but did grumble at the sandwiches - £4.10! Not on your Nelly!!

All too soon it was Thursday morning and I packed up the car to come home. I drove through the whole gamut of rain, wind and sunshine as I headed northwards up the M5 and dodged a car that had shed its canoes from the roof onto the hard shoulder. Finally the familiar landscape of home loomed as I saw the Malverns rising from the ground and the wind whispered “nearly there” to the drone of “home, home, home” from my tyres as they ate up the remaining miles of tarmac.

My heart always lifts when I see those hills – they’re not majestic mountains, or dramatic cliffs but their presence on the landscape marks home to me. They are beautiful and graceful, gentle almost, as they rise out of the ground close to the triangle where Herefordshire, Gloucestershire and Worcestershire meet. They were Elgar’s inspiration and I truly understand why. I have walked the length and breadth of them, as he did, and never ceased to marvel at the views over this, my very favourite part of our beautiful island.

As I turned into our lane and past the village shop, I waved to John as he was sorting out the locally grown tomatoes in the boxes outside and then pulled over for the hedge cutting tractor. Life was going on as usual and thoughts drifted to seeing the dogs and cat again, making my first cuppa for 3 hours and waiting for J to come home from work. When I got out of the car to open the gate, I could hear the dogs barking with excitement as they recognized the sound of my car and it brought a smile to my face. I love going away and seeing new places – marveling at the diverse countryside to be found a few hours down the road, breathing sea air and having my hair whipped around my head by the sea breeze. But I always love coming back again, just as much, or even more. The going away makes the homecoming even sweeter and I can look around with renewed vigour, rather than horror, as I make a mental note of things to go on my list before I get flattened by 3 furry hounds.

Forgive me Headmistress – it has been too long since I last blogged and joined in with class properly.

What can I say? I have popped in briefly and signed the register. Occasionally I have gone on class outings with the Welsh/Marches girls, but on the whole I have been absent. And to top it all, I’ve lost the wires that connect the camera to the computer. I say “I” but that is very tongue in cheek – it is not “I” but “he”…….. as well as his car keys, mobile phone, blah, blah……… So no pictures to put up to at least show some excuse for my absence as we now enter the tweaking and pruning section of finishing the extension.

To do list: New bedroom – finish painting 2 walls and paint skirtings/door frames and wax windows. Paint floor. Get curtains. Hang curtains. Move in.
Ensuite – last coat of paint on floor.
Office – paint everything and wax everything else. Hang blind.
New staircase – ditto.
Hall – hang pictures.
Downstairs loo – paint shoe pigeonholes and hang mirror/hat rack. Hang blind.
Utility room – Wax window and sand/reseal worktop and sink area. Paint inside cupboard doors (yes, I know you can’t see inside but I’ll know they need doing…) Get a blind. Hang it.
Porch – lay floor tiles.
Kitchen – paint shutters.
Garden – don’t go there!

Apart from that, we are so very nearly done. This last final push is the worse bit as we can now live happily in the house just as it is and this is dangerous. It would be too easy to stop and “have a rest” for a bit, but I know that the little niggly things would never get finished off (like inside those cupboards). So, Dad has been coming for the last couple of weeks and has been sanding rough bits, touching up the paintwork here and there, filling in little cracks and holes and generally pulling it all together and driving us along. Last week he painted our new stable door and it looks brill. At the weekend Mum came and moved all the left over pieces of Kingspan stored in the gazebo and put them behind the barn out of the way. Then we sat in it and had lunch in the garden, eyes firmly averted from the trenches half filled in and the skip that still sits outside the back door.

A sedge warbler is nesting low down in one of the garden borders. We had heard its glorious warbling and thought it was nesting down near our neighbour’s pond but, no, this daft but exquisite little bird decided to make its nest in full view of anyone walking past with a sharp eye. At first we thought it was a field mouse nest, as it was positioned tilted slightly forward. Then, when Mum went to look, the eggs had appeared and the female was agitatedly flitting from branch to branch of a nearby tree. We were terrified she’d abandon the nest but the change in the weather turned our attention to all things inside again until yesterday when Mum went to check and two little yellow edged beaks could be seen waiting for their next feed. Mum didn’t hang about but we are all hoping that there’s more than just two from the clutch of eggs we saw.
Whilst all this has been going on, I’ve been laid up with a bad foot, and feeling frustrated at my lack of mobility. It was coming on when I met up with Bodran, CCA, Elizabethm, Mountainear and SBS at The Dingle Nurseries near Welshpool. I was glad to pull onto the car park as my foot was throbbing and I managed to hobble around, buoyed along by excellent company, fantastic surroundings and glorious weather. I even succumbed to buying a few plants for my ravaged garden but not as many as CCA! I dreaded the drive home but eventually made it and hoped the anti-inflammatories would soon kick in.

Several weeks later and here I am, sat with my feet up and almost at the end of a course of combined antibiotics. The inflammation became my first ever ulcer on the ball of my foot (I get them regularly on my hands): I cried and railed against Scleroderma and I have never been so miserable. I would have sheepishly logged on for a Purple Hug request if my laptop hadn’t been packed away for the final bit of plastering as we had a new ceiling in the dining room. But no, I couldn’t even surf the net so sat and wailed in pain and frustration, surrounded by books I couldn’t muster up the enthusiasm to read, while Mum and Dad beavered away on the house and J was at work.

And then, on Saturday night, our beloved George finally succumbed to the lung cancer that’s ravaged his body since Christmas. He saw his 78th birthday the week before and then went to join his darling daughter, A, who left us last year with a brain tumour. George and Olive had managed a final visit to see us in April – they knew time was running out and George so desperately wanted to see the house. They have been second parents to J and he looks haggard with the grief of losing the man who played the role of father to him when his own could not. As for Olive, she is in a whirl as she has lost her husband and only child within a year.

We are all numb and I sit and gaze out of the window at the hive of activity as birds are feeding their young. My friend texts me pictures of her 3 month old daughter. The birds are singing as the cycle of life continues around us; my eyes fill up with tears of sadness for lost ones but then I manage a watery smile and give thanks for being a part of it all.

The pictures are of us with George during happier times - we miss him already.